Are you in emotional pain and doing whatever you can to soothe your battered nervous system?
How you think of yourself, and how you understand the connection between your emotions and your behaviors will make the difference.
Recovery from addiction/compulsive self-soothing habits begins when we ask for help, and begin the process of healing the pain we’ve been trying to medicate.
Gabor Mate' said, "the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety. It's CONNECTION."
We’re hard-wired for connection. A a species we cannot survive without it. Thanks to the intelligence of nature, we are physiologically designed to seek connection with others around us.
When those connections go wrong, when we’re betrayed or ignored / harmed by those who say they love us, connections become painful.
The very thing we need to ensure our survival becomes something to protect ourselves from.
We take on burdens in the form of defeatist beliefs like, “I'm unlovable”, “I’m unworthy”, “I’m broken and can’t be fixed”, and “I don’t deserve anything good.” We carry these burdens well into adulthood, sometimes to the end.
These burdens carry so much pain and do so much damage to our lives and those around us.
People drink, drug, and will do just about anything to numb those sensations.
A traumatized amygdala and autonomic nervous system believes you’re in danger - even when you’re not. Human beings are wired to seek safety in order to soothe the nervous system.
The painful energy trapped up in those burdens feels like life or death to the nervous system. And so, we reach for…whatever works. Sometimes those choices drill us deeper into a hole.
This is not a moral issue. It’s not a conscious choice, and it’s no reflection on your character, regardless of what your shame tells you.
This condition is a physiological impulse within your body. It will continue to agitate you until you find new ways to be with it. “I’ve tried a dozen times, but nothing works for me”, you might say.
This is the voice of despair so common after many efforts to control behavior by demonizing it. “Nothing works” is inaccurate if you’ve only given half an effort - OR -
...perhaps given full effort to a model that asks you to turn against yourself by complying with language, rituals, dogmas and ideologies that insult your soul.
The consequences of untreated addictions and alcoholism are horrible, often lethal. This does not require you to call yourself ugly names or join clubs that insist you sign onto their religion.
Your behavioral patterns are signals pointing to your healing. Are you ready to sit and listen to those signals? Are you ready to sit with your burdens? A better future is not only possible. It’s your destiny.
It is calling out to you and the path is to go through the muddy pit, not around or above it.
If any of this has resonated with you, I want you to know that there is hope, and that you can turn things around.
Reach out to me today, and take the next step to a brighter future. Remember the magic formula: I NEED HELP.
On the “about” page of this website, you can read more about my specific approach to helping men restore their vitality and sense of peace, joy and freedom after a bout with destructive compulsive habits.
About Me
Licensed Provider
Greg Liotta, LMSW
Texas: 108650
NYS: 036984
Important Notices
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Based in Austin, Texas